How Two Simple Words Can Transform Your Travel Experience (and Your Life!)

Like me, you probably spend more time than you’d like navigating crowded airports, delayed flights and tight connections. Let me introduce you to two words that have forever changed how I feel about airport lines, missed flights and inconsiderate strangers: Let Them.

These two simple words will not only change your entire approach to business travel—they’re going to change your entire approach to life.

The Let Them Theory is a simple mindset tool I discovered that millions of people use every day to take back control of their lives. Here’s how it works: The moment you’re in a frustrating situation—in a meeting, on a plane or with your spouse—and something starts to bother you, just say: Let Them.

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Your flight is canceled? Let Them.

Your bags don’t make it? Let Them.

The lines are long at the car rental desk? Let Them.

Your kids make you feel guilty because you have to go away again next week for work? Let Them.

Once you try it out, you won’t be able to stop. It’s liberating. But why?

The reason the Let Them Theory is so powerful is because of a fundamental law of human nature: You will never be able to control other people. Intellectually, you probably know this. But now think about how you’ve been living your life: The long line you can’t control irritates you. The passenger coughing without covering his mouth annoys you. Your overbearing supervisor makes you doubt your worth and contributions at work. How many of the negative thoughts and feelings you experience in a day are related to other people? Their actions, their opinions, their emotions, their words? I’d be willing to bet that most, if not all, of them are.

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By acknowledging this, you take back power over your own life. Right now, you’re giving your power away. You may be thinking, No, I’m not. But then why is so much of your day spent managing, pleasing or worrying about other people? Why do others have so much sway over your feelings and state of mind?

Once you see this, you’ll realize how much time and energy you’ve been wasting on them all along. Time and energy that could have been spent on the things that actually matter: your goals, your happiness and your peace of mind.

Now, you may be thinking: Isn’t this just like saying, “Let it go”? Or just…giving up? It doesn’t feel freeing; it feels like you’re just letting everyone do whatever they want. And that’s where the second, and arguably most important, part of the Let Them Theory comes in: Let Me.

Let Me is the part where you take back your power. It’s the part where you get to choose what happens next. Let Me decide what I’m going to do, say or feel in response to what’s happening. When you stop constantly reacting to the world around you, you’ll realize there’s only one person you’ll ever be able to control, and that is you.

You decide not to react. You decide how things affect you. You decide how to respond.

When you hear that dreaded message on the intercom that your flight has been delayed, Let Them. It’s okay. You can’t change it. Now, Let Me answer those emails I’ve been putting off. Let Me make that phone call I’ve been avoiding.

The next time there’s a baby screaming on the plane, Let Them. There’s nothing you can do about it. Babies cry—it’s a part of life. So, Let Me put on my noise-canceling headphones. Let Me play some music. Let Me offer a kind smile to the overwhelmed parent.

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When you say Let Them, you release the hold that external factors have on your internal state. When you say Let Me, you take responsibility for what happens next. The fastest way to control your life is to stop trying to control what’s going on around you and focus on what you can control: yourself. This tool is going to be your new favorite travel companion.

Mel Robbins is a New York Times best-selling author. Her books, which have sold millions of copies and are translated into 50 languages, include The Let Them Theory, The 5 Second Rule, The High 5 Habit and seven number-one audiobook releases on Audible. She’s also the creator and host of the award-winning Mel Robbins Podcast. She has amassed 21 million followers online and is considered the most sought-after expert in life improvement, mindset and behavior change. melrobbins.com